‘Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle’ Trailers Greet Us with Open, Giant Arms

Get ready to see the jungle prison where Robin Williams’ Alan Parrish spent the entirety of his adult life! That’s where we’re headed with Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, the sequel that adds video game and another convoluted level of magic to the Jumanji mythos.

The film follows the Power Rangers format of swiping the Breakfast Club setup and adding little glowing gems. Four conspicuously-archetypical, diverse teens are thrown together in detention and given the task of cleaning the school’s basement. Inexplicably, there they find a late-’70s gaming console with a couple peculiarities. Its graphics are unexpectedly crisp, and more integral to the plot, it’s got a luminous green rock on it that sucks players into the trademarked world of Jumanji.

Once the concept of selecting a character in a video game is needlessly spelled out, the kids are transported to the jungle, where they find that the characters they chose have become their mismatched physical bodies. The skinny nerd becomes The Rock; the pretty, popular girl becomes Jack Black (“I’m an overweight, middle-aged man,” she explains after gazing upon her unspeakably-poor CGI reflection); the burly jock becomes shorter as Kevin Hart; and the bookish, overlooked girl becomes a scantily-clad Karen Gillan. Aided by special video game powers, the group must face Jumanji’s many jungle dangers—like its jungle cats, and its jungle gangs of violent bikers. In other words, it’s not really all that much like Jumanji at all. It’s more like one of Dwayne Johnson’s Journey films meets a body-swapping comedy.

Sex Tape‘s Jake Kasdan directed the film. Bobby Cannavale, Rhys Darby, Nick Jonas, and the killer from Too Many Cooks co-star. Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle hits theaters December 20.

  • jaime_arg

    Apparently a studio executive sat down with the writer and said “Take Jurassic World, add a little Jumanji mojo, and then make it more forgettable.”

    The only positive thing about this trailer was Rhys Darby but that’s not enough to make me watch this film.

    • adam3w

      I was thinking more along the lines of Jumanji: Fury Road with a script punch-up by the guys from Broken Lizard.

      • jaime_arg

        Yeah the Fury Road component is definitely there, as is the early 2000s comedy.
        It just felt like Jurassic World visually.

        • adam3w

          I think the actual movie is likely to be closer to your comparison than to mine. The trailer just felt crammed with epic chase scenes à la Fury Road.

  • WhiteEagle2

    I feel like they named the movie around that song.

    • jaime_arg

      I would be surprised if you were wrong.

  • HalSolo

    I’m just really angry these characters and this video game premise is CLEARLY based on a mid-90s jungle adventure game aesthetic. Too much work to have them discover a goddamned SNES and a PITFALL THE MAYAN ADVENTURE cartridge? Or maybe just a PS1? They’re millennials, that shit would still seem ancient to them.

    • They put frustratingly little effort into the console’s consistency. I mentioned the absurdly smooth graphics, but I held back on nerdily calling them out on the system having composite RCA outputs when they all had crappy coax RF adapters back then.

      • adam3w

        NEEEEERD! Wait. *takes off glasses* Those stupid bastards.

  • HalSolo

    Holy shit. They miss-spelled ARCHAEOLOGIST on the fucking title screen.
    Unless the Rock is playing an Archeologist.

    • jaime_arg

      They meant to write Archerologist, one who obsessively watches all seasons of Archer.