Zac Efron will play our new Firestarter‘s dad

I’M A FIRESTARTUH! TWISTED FIRESTARTUH!

A haunting sign of how old we’ve all grown, 17 Again and High School Mujsical star Zac Efron is now going to play a father figure. He’ll reportedly star in Firestarter, Keith Thomas’s remake of the Stephen King adaptation of the same name. He’ll play dad to a young girl who develops pyrokinetic abilities, having been born of parents who had some government experiments done on them. Because what America surely needs now is another story of parents accidentally creating massive fires due to childbirth.

Please help these sad nobodies and: