Squid Game reality competition to really miss that point of that, huh?

Since the technology still does not exist to create an actual RoboCop, corporate America has found another way to unironically turn capitalist satire into reality: setting up an actual Squid Game competition.

Following through on their threat that “The Squid Game universe has just begun,” Netflix has reportedly given the greenlight to Squid Game: The Challenge.

While, in addition to a second season of his Squid Game, creator Hwang Dong-hyuk has been working on a self-referential satire about his overnight success story, The Challenge will go meta in the other way. Which is to say, completely backward.

Using the dystopian series as a guidebook, the reality show will see 456 contestants play “games inspired by the original show, plus new additions” as they form alliances and compete for a record-setting $4.56 million lump-sum prize. Casting is “currently open to English-language speakers from anywhere in the world.” Because if there were two lessons to take from Squid Game, they were a.) that desperate people should actually be exploited to live out Squid Game; and b.) it should be exclusively English-language.

The move comes as Netflix faces increasing competition from rival streaming services like Amazon, where people have long been held captive in a dystopian hellscape made real for the grand prize of about $16/hr.

Please help these sad nobodies and: