Jiminy Cricket: Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Cynthia Erivo join Disney’s Pinocchio

It’s official: Joseph Gordon-Levitt will voice whatever it is Jiminy Cricket is supposed to be.

The actor has reportedly signed on to Disney+’s Pinocchio in the iconic role of what’s ostensibly a dapper insect despite in no way resembling a bug. Honestly, if they called this smooth little green weirdo an alien, that would make a lot more sense than pretending it’s a clothed cricket, but whatever.

Anyway, Harriet‘s Cynthia Erivo has also signed on to the Robert Zemeckis-directed live-action/CGI remake in the role of the Blue Fairy that plays God, granting life to an old man’s boy doll. The two join a cast that already includes Zemeckis regular Tom Hanks as Gepetto, Benjamin Evan Ainsworth as Pinocchio, Keegan-Michael Key as the voice of Honest John, Luke Evans as the coachman, and Lorraine Bracco as the newly-added Sofia the Seagull.

Zemeckis co-wrote the script with Chris Weitz, so one of them is who thought, “You know what this story of a wooden boy being brought to life by a star fairy, talking to an alien-bug thing, getting trashed, turning into a partial donkey, and getting swallowed by a whale is begging for? Talking bird.”

Please help these sad nobodies and: