Live-action Pac-Man movie to bring ghost-plagued eating disorder to real world

The Hollywood Reporter today revealed that arcade classic Pac-Man is becoming a live-action movie. And what is there to even say about that?

Is it patently ridiculous to make a feature film about a yellow semi-circle gobbling pellets as he avoids ghosts? Of course it is. Have there somehow already been several odd narrative properties built upon this concept—such as an ‘80s animated series and a more recent CGI take? Uh-huh! Is it even more insane but completely believable that an associate producer of the dismal Sonic the Hedgehog movie would likewise decide to pluck Pac-Man from his colorful world to make some sort of Alvin and the Chipmunks thing out of it? Absolutely!

So there it is.

It’s not yet here, though. So, like the long-gestating plans for a Space Invaders movie, it could just never really come together. Alternately, we get a 2024 movie where Josh Radnor meets and lives with Pac-Man, and has to keep feeding him buckets of cherries to stave off ghost attacks in a small Pacific NW town. Ultimately, who cares? Gobble up your entertainment pill and move on.

Please help these sad nobodies and: