Today Apple TV+ completed the first season of Amazing Stories, the revival of Steven Spielberg’s scattershot but well-regarded ’80s anthology series of the same name. Sort of like the Fargo television series, the experiment was slavishly indebted to its creator’s oeuvre and flavor—minus the powerhouse cast, handsome production values, and any semblance of entertainment. Apple’s Spielberg-approximating AI produced the five following results:
// “The Cellar”
{
An average American handyman (Dylan O’Brien) finds himself in the extraordinary situation of traveling back-and-forth in time between 1919 and present-day. During his quest to return home he forms an unexpected bond with a woman from the past and attempts to rescue her, ultimately learning a valuable lesson about himself in the process. Grade: D+
}
error: insufficient spielbergs
// “The Heat”
{
An average American high school track star (Hailey Kilgore) finds herself in the extraordinary situation of getting hit by a car and coming back as a ghost. During her quest to find out who killed her she discovers an unexpected way to train her best friend to run from the afterlife, ultimately learning a valuable lesson about herself in the process. Grade: D
}
error: insufficient spielbergs
// “Dynoman and the Volt!”
{
An average American septuagenarian (Robert Forster) finds himself in the extraordinary situation of receiving a back-of-the-comic-book mail order ring that grants him super powers. During his quest to test his abilities he finds a unexpected way to finally bond with his imaginative grandson, ultimately learning a valuable lesson about himself in the process. Grade: C-
}
error: insufficient spielbergs
// “Signs of Life”
{
An average American comatose mother (Michelle Wilson) finds herself in the extraordinary situation of waking up after six years but struggling to remember her old life and daughter. During her quest to adjust she develops an unexpected way to see the world and bond with her daughter, ultimately learning a valuable lesson about herself in the process. Grade: D+
}
error: insufficient spielbergs
// “The Rift”
{
An average American World War II pilot (Austin Stowell) finds himself in the extraordinary situation of crashing in present-day Ohio. During his quest to reunite with his lost love, evade government meanies, and return home, he develops an unexpected bond with an imaginative boy still coping with the loss of his father, ultimately learning a valuable lesson about himself in the process. Grade: C
}
assessment: OPTIMUM SPIELBERGS ATTAINED
